Ways that social support can help

Social Support is a hot topic currently, and it is discussed in many articles, books, and podcasts in the last couple of months. It could be the missing piece that we have been looking for to feel normal again. We have been focused on self-care for the last couple of years and it’s usually been in the confinement of the four walls, mostly in the areas of therapy, exercise, and meditation just to name a few.

My self-care list; 1. Exercising – in the garage and riding my bike.

2. Eating healthy-juicing.

3. Finance – laser focus budgeting.

4. Uncluttering my home.

5. Giving – volunteering my time and money to others who needed help with basic living needs. It gave me the focus to look beyond what was going on in the world during the pandemic. Now that it has been a year since most of us have been back into society and 5 months since most safety restrictions have been lifted and we are all searching for something.

I hear the question said in many of my conversations, “How do we get back into the community?” or the statement “I feel lonely.” I read an article recently that referred to a “Morning Consult Survey”, conducted by Cigna which gave some numbers on loneliness. “They found 60% of adults feel lonely; women slightly more than men. Young adults are twice as likely to be lonely than seniors. Nearly 80% of Americans aged 18-24 reported feeling lonely.”

So I got curious to see what the numbers were before the pandemic. I found another survey that was done by Cigna in 2018 (Cigna 2018 U.S. Loneliness Index using the UCLA Loneliness Scale). It found that 46% of Americans feel alone. Only half of Americans have meaningful in-person social interactions. Just below 50% of Americans aged 18-24 feel lonely.

Wow, a bit of a jump in the numbers, but still not as high as I thought. It seems obvious that the numbers would change if we had more in-person interactions. To figure out why that isn’t happening we need to look at how we created that social support before the pandemic. A good starting place is making a list in your journal. My list would look like this;

1. I invited my friend Diana to dinner and a movie we both wanted to see.

2. Met my friend Sheri for a hike.

3. RSVP’d for the social event.

4. Talking to co-workers.

5. Socializing after work.

6. Camping with a group of families.

7. Impromptu meet-ups with neighbors during the week.

8. Going to a pot-luck dinner.

Sometimes social support could come from a deeper place that allows us to be our new vulnerable authentic selves. We are out of practice, and I know I feel my conversation contribution can feel stagnant and dried up. Those opportunities are still available, plus new ones you haven’t tried before like; Walking the neighborhood with a neighbor during lunch. Meeting up for a bike ride, starting a book club, or picking up guitar to learn. There are endless possibilities, you just have to say yes to them because it really isn’t about the product, but the process. If you are taking the class to create a social opportunity does it matter if you walk away after 6 sessions not fully knowing how to play a guitar?

What does your social support looks like?

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